Category: life

We’ve committed fully to Fall Time by putting up our beloved teepee and snuggling close to read books in the tight quarters nightly. Leaves sprinkle our table tops and the squirrels are busy in the backyard getting ready for the cold months ahead. I’ve officially said goodbye to the 2nd trimester of this pregnancy and am slowly welcoming the REALLY pregnant feeling that comes with the 3rd trimester. Hard to believe that just three months ago I was getting ready to start working again and three months from now I’ll be holding the newest member of our family. Without a doubt, I’ve found myself in the middle ground of a transition. 

This week I had a chance to have conferences with the parents of my students. I really love conferences because it gives me a chance to gain insight into the lives that  my students lead beyond my classroom door. Sometimes I have conferences that leave me feeling sad, deflated and heavy. Many times children are asked to carry heavy loads and make adult-like decisions or deal with situations beyond their control; knowing when food stamps arrive, not having a coat, being ignored, left alone, or losing a family member…every family has their story. Times are tough for many families. 

For every story that is hard and difficult to hear, I remind myself that I’m grateful to hear those stories and offer any help that I can. Sometimes I wish my skill set was more abundant.   Mostly, when I hear about a difficult situation it makes me more compassionate, understanding and my approach to working with that student changes. I tend to forget sometimes that not everybody comes from a happy, healthy home.  It is much easier to believe that each child has what they deserve, but conferences always brings the truth. 

That said, many of my conferences are with families that aren’t struggling and aren’t faced with as many challenges at this time. These families also remind me, in a different way, to be present in my own life. To not get too ahead of myself and count my many blessings. My heart hurts in a different way after talking with parents that regularly get to spend time with their children and are concerned about the simplest of things.  I wish that I could take a bit of their attentiveness and concern and sprinkle it on the heads of the families that are neither attentive or concerned. 

Because the best thing that I’ve ever done is become a mother, most of my thoughts circle back to life with Maggie and how what I’m doing as an adult affects her. This week, more than any in my recent memory, was one in which I felt overly thankful and even a bit guilty for how lucky we are with the simple life we live. Both Barry and I have extraordinary examples of parents. We both came from homes that were happy. We had coats, food, and above all else, a whole lot of love every single day of our childhoods. Our parents were both attentive and concerned about our well being. 

 Some of the most incredible adults that I know have thrived in their lives without having had a solid, safe, love-filled home as a child. And I see them and think about my students, the ones carrying heavy loads,  and it gives me an incredible amount hope for their future.  Perhaps my classroom can be a space in their life where they feel safe and loved. My classroom can be a place where they get to be carefree and leave their heavy load at the door….at least for a bit. 

Months away from becoming a mother again….and already I’ve found myself wondering if the skills that I’ve got will be enough as a mother, as parent, as a leader to both my daughters. This week, conferencing with the different families of my students, was like a pinch on the cheek, or a slap on my wrist. It is almost as if I needed to hear the message that doing our best, doing what we know, is sometimes exactly enough….in parenting, teaching, listening. Just as my classroom can be a safe  place for my students, full of love and care, the home I create and maintain for my children can be just that….safe and full of love.